B and I are up north right now. The dogs (and B) are crashed out on the couch and guess who refuses to sit down? Yeah. Me. We went to TC today and sat on the beach for an hour just watching the people, listening to the waves and enjoying being next to each other and not having to say anything; it felt like everything we wanted to say was already being said for us. I can never stop talking and whenever B isn't talking I know I either a) annoyed the crap out of him or b) he's thinking in this circumstance he was thinking, long and hard about everything. This was the last time him and I would be doing our favorite thing in the world...sitting on the lake doing nothing. It was truly bittersweet sitting at lunch today at our favorite TC restaurant.
With that said, it is all hitting me. He leaves next Friday and only comes homes for 48 hours at the end of September enough time to wash everything and say one last goodbye. Most of you may be saying to yourself at least he is coming home..but saying goodbye once is hard enough, having to do it again? The tears have stopped, not sure where they went. Today I should have been a basket case but I just couldn't cry.
I feel bad I haven't gotten as much work done with my photographer (or my regular job for that matter) as I normally do. There is just so much to do. Everyday we have someone to see, someone coming to us, have to do this, sign here, talk about this, do you want to buy this? okay we need to sell both cars and than you need to look for a new one, what about the house? we need to start a list so when I get home we can already have it sold, its 11:30? okay we have to get some sleep...and the countdown continues.
Before meeting Army girlfriends I was so hesitant towards for a number of different shallow, shallow reasons. After meeting a few I couldn't imagine not being their friends. Girlfriend, wife, mother they understand. Its almost like there is a small weight lifted off of my shoulders. I am truly not alone.
...Now with that said, why do I feel like I am the only one having the hardest time with this? I feel like the crazy one because every morning I wake up and think of 10 more days, 9 more days, 8 more days, etc. Shouldn't I be enjoying the time he's here and not focus on how many days we have left? Oh, because I am crazy.